Written by Gelo Te
Interview with the Pitmalord
Hey, RevoNation! PWR Central’s newest writer, Gelo Te here! First things first, I have to say you’re all in for a treat. I’ve had the honor of sitting down with one half of the KakaiBros, Mh4rckie! The freshly-freed Best Englisher in the World shared what transpired during his days in captivity courtesy of the YOLO Twins.
“mhy LhyF ass A pArisHion3r”
Now, Mharckllyod Katrino D. aka Mh4rckie, has had a rough couple of weeks prior to PWR Live: Shake, Rassle, & Roll. The Entitled Ones from Katips, the YOLO Twins, forcibly took the Pitmalord hostage at their residence.
I could not imagine the torment he endured. Thankfully, Mh4rckie has been gracious enough to tell all.
“The y0l0 twines tryded 2 mhaked me bec0med a y0l0 twines 2. Th3y qived me very very dhelixuus fo0ds. Sleeped in airc0nd ro0ms. Playd xb0x, plistexi0n. Buyed me inxpensib cl0ths. Brinqed me 2 stharr citi.
but they whanted me 2 trait0red Kh3ndrick, my phartner, d bhiq dhawqqq, d cruszh in all enterns, d jhemerlhynn drheam, my br0hter fr0m mh0hter an0hter. But I im will n0t trait0red kh3ndrick over matherial thinqs. Bc0z blo0d is thiccer then mh0ney.”
EDI SA PUSO MO
Free from captivity, Mh4rckie quickly reunited with his tag team partner, Kendrick Lamas aka Kh3ndrick. Together, they gave me the 411 on the much-clamored Edi Sa Puso Mo Street Fight.
At this point, my jejespeak proficiency started to run dry. Thus, I got help from the Naughty Boys’ intern, Jhemherlhynn, who translated Kh3ndrick’s (and Mh4rckie’s) words with enthusiasm.
Kh3ndrick: dYn h0m3thon nMen ih hihE! Snz di4n kme gling, pptk3m nm3n sza YULO tUw3ns pn0 muh-bh3atdun wD wH3af0ns n makKup3th—3ste—mbbil3 sza tRin0ma! wH3af0ns lyk phLung3r, pL4n66aNuh, dHrumz, h4n6ir, 4r3n0Luh , , ,
Mh4rckie: UhMm, , , , , , exCuse lNg jH3l0 huh? Sh0utout lN6,, ,to oUr critix d’ YOLO Thwins! mGa pUk**6 **a niNyo critix kY0! U d0nt nid m0n3y 2 pruv Ur a tRu PITMALORD!!!
K: Diyan ang ‘hometown’ namin eh haha! Since diyan kami galing, papatikim namin sa YOLO Twins paano ma-beatdown with weapons na makukupit–este–mabibili sa Trinoma! Weapons like plunger, planggana, drum, hanger, arinola.
M: Uhm, excuse lang Gelo huh? Shoutout lang, to our critics, the YOLO Twins. Mga p**k**g *** ninyo critics kayo! You don’t need to have money to prove you’re a true PITMALORD.
Before I bade the KakaiBros goodbye, they had two words to say about getting their hands on the YOLO Twins this Sunday at PWR Vendetta…
SOUNDS LIKE GOOD.